December 14, 2006

Stay Classy, Greater Tampa Bay-St. Petersberg Area

The Devil Rays, now officially reeking of desperation, will play a series with the Texas Rangers next summer at Disney World. According to the article,

"We hope these games whet the appetite of fans from Central Florida and they'll take us up on our offer to come sample Rays baseball and our fan experience at Tropicana Field," Devil Rays president Matt Silverman said.

Hey, Matt, you know what might make fans take you up on your "offer to come sample Rays baseball"? WINNING MORE THAN 61 GAMES. Also, perhaps investing something beyond pocket change into your team, thereby attracting a pitcher more impressive than the mighty Casey Fossum, would be of some help. Given the team's status as a perpetual punchline, I'm amazed they even managed to draw 16,000 fans a game.

Last year at this time they were wondering if changing the name of the Devil Rays to something a little less Satanic might help attendance. For fuck's sake, it's been 10 years and the team has never even sniffed a winning record; get your heads out of your collective asses before your team is mercifully contracted.

Thank you.

P.S. FieldTurf sucks.

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