June 18, 2008

No, Wait...

... I spoke too soon. THIS is really the kind of thing you should try to announce at 3:15 AM:

Yep. Via RAB, the Yanks have signed... gah... Sir Sidney Ponson to a minor league deal. That sound you hear is the entire Scranton-Wilkes Barre Police Department whipping out their breathalyzers.

Ponson, famous for his multiple DUIs, inexplicable knighthood (wtf, Netherlands?), and occasional Aruban judge-punching, was released by Texas a few weeks ago -- and while you might assume he's learned his lesson and the Rangers just dropped him because he's not a good pitcher, you'd be wrong:

Ponson was reportedly put on notice after creating a serious disturbance at the hotel bar in St. Petersburg, Fla. during the team's recent road trip and told that further problems would not be tolerated.

He also reacted furiously after being taken out of a June 4 game against the Indians and with being pushed back from the start that was to follow that outing, prompting Rangers general manager Jon Daniels to say, "We don't feel Sidney deserves to be here or wants to be here."

Of course I doubt Ponson will start for the Yankees more than a few times, if at all (light a candle for Dan Giese), so this probably won't end up being very significant. But as much as everyone's been getting on the Mets the last two days, and rightfully so, let's be careful about bemoaning their lack of class as compared to the Yankees*, a team which within the span of a few hours has deliberately allied itself with both Sidney Ponson and the Hard Rock Cafe.

*I've heard a lot of this, even from Mets fans, who I can only assume are so aggravated right now that they're suffering from selective memory loss. Never mind that smarmy crypto-offer the Yankees made to Joe Torre just last fall -- I mean, Billy Martin would have killed to be fired as tactfully as Willie Randolph was.


perpetualmemoryloss said...

As a Mets fan this makes my dull, dreary day just a little bit brighter. Although I'm not sure what is worse Sidney or the Hard Rock?

Emma said...

Worse than either one is the prospect of Sidney Ponson AT the Hard Rock.

Ah well... guess it could be worse. That's still an improvement over, say, Jose Lima at Lobster Hut.

I guess.

Meet the Shits said...


Boomer wasn't available?

Ray said...

But Billy Martin always got his job back the following week.

It was kind of a fun drinking game in the late 70s to guess whether the Miller Lite commercial would be the "you're hired" or the "you're fired" one. Kinda like guessing whether Dick Van Dyke was gonna trip over the ottoman or not.