Michael Kay: Genius

I’m not a superstitious person in most areas of my life, opening umbrellas indoors with impunity and walking under ladders at every opportunity – but I do have that streak in me when it comes to sports. I’m always afraid I’ll jinx a good thing, which is why, if the Yankees are ahead by 12 runs in the 9th inning, playing the Kansas City Royals, with 2 out and two strikes and Mariano Rivera on the mound, I will still generally avoid saying anything stronger than, “well, it certainly looks as if the Yankees have a good chance of winning this game.”

I’m not so COMPLETELY insane, however, as to actually believe any of this matters, and I certainly would never get mad when someone else says something, um, jinxish (new word!). So I understand why Yankees’ announcer Michael Kay would be frustrated when idiots started calling up his radio show, bitching and yelling because he “jinxed” Chien-Ming Wang during a potential perfect game. But, that said… justifying his breach of “baseball etiquette” by blaming “etiquette” for 1) slavery and 2) the Holocaust? Insensitive, yeah, sure, but mostly, just staggeringly stupid. I’m surprised the New York media hasn’t been all over him on this (aren’t they run by the Jews?); I only saw it mentioned at Fire Joe Morgan, where you can listen to the clip if, like me, you can't quite believe Kay could actually be that dumb. I guess in this case it’s actually a blessing that no one much listens to his show. Also: thank Christ Bobby Murcer doesn’t have a call-in talk show. “We’ll be back to discuss why leadoff walks are worse than Al Qaeda, right after these messages! Don't go away.”

Anyway. The Yanks have a tough stretch coming up, playing the White Sox and the Angels (who I’ve come to loathe more than any other team in either league – more on that later in the week), followed by a slight break at Camden Yards before Baseball Armageddon: five games in four days at Fenway Park. The Sox are playing Kansas City and Baltimore next, so I’d expect them to make up some ground before the rain of locusts begins. Note to self: cancel all appointments that week.

And speaking of the Red Sox, they now have someone named Corky playing for them. After, off the top of my head, Willy Mo, Coco, and Kason -- say what you want about that team but they’ve certainly had some great names on the roster this year.