August 18, 2006

Tell Your God To Ready For Blood

During the recent insane heat wave, city officials urged people to rest, avoid unnecessary exertion, drink water, and seek medical attention if they had trouble breathing, chest pains, or dizziness and confusion. I think the same warnings should also be applied to Yankees and Red Sox fans this weekend, particularly those with a history of cardiac or respiratory problems. In addition, I urge younger, healthy fans to check in periodically on their older and more infirm neighbors and acquaintances. At times like this we all have to help each other.

The only part of the heat wave advice that doesn't apply is here is that people should avoid alcoholic beverages, which can be dehydrating. On the contrary, in this situation a stiff drink is definitely called for. Starting at lunch today. The best thing Yankees fans can do for themselves now is dull the pain, make everything a blur, and wake up somewhere unexpected Tuesday morning, when it's all over.

When our ancient ancestors climbed out of the primordial ooze and checked the baseball schedule, it was already obvious that this was going to be a huge series. Having had the dubious pleasure of watching yesterday's terrifically ugly loss to the Orioles, about which the less said the better, I can't say I have a lot of confidence at the moment; but once my eyes stopped bleeding I reminded myself that every team has some rough patches and the occasional horrific game, and momentum can turn in one inning. Actually, it's hard to say whether Red Sox or Yankees fans are more down on their team these days -- but hey, even when the Royals play the Pirates, somebody has to win.

I'll be listening to the first game at work, via the radio, but I'll miss at least the first part of tonight's game because, strangely enough, I have to go see Snakes on a Plane for work. But for those of you who will be watching, drink lots of water, wear light loose-fitting clothing, and consult your doctor if you experience feelings of weakness, confusion, or nausea. Or just turn off the TV until Sidney Ponson is out of the game.

4 comments:

From the Vined Smithy said...

Woe, dread, despair!

But you take it, knowing someday the shoe will be on the other foot.

I swear, there are hours at a time when I want to give up baseball, just not bother with the emotional rollercoaster I have no control over. But I inevitably end up (the next day or next season) excited and filled with hope.

But getting up this morning was pretty difficult. It was like having a baseball hangover.

Emma said...

I have a baseball hangover AND a real hangover.

Don't panic. Three and half games with more than a month left to play and something like 7 head-to-head games left is hardly a comfortable cushion. Unfortunately...

Anonymous said...

Well, another landmark game that, despite, suffocating, annual and ritualistic media hype, is actually something of a landmark. This is the wondrous thing about baseball..it transcends the people who own it and consistently try and screw it up. Try as they might, we find ourselves sensing that something important has happened, even if we are not precisely sure what it might be.
Here's what I think it is: the Yankees have learned from the teams thumping them in recent years. The loss of Matsui and their ill-tempered right fielder Gary Sheffield and their pitching woes and injuries has spawned a post-Steinbrenner era in which the Yankees have been forced to give up their money addictions and construct a younger, more versatile, cockier and effective baseball teams.
This game marks the end of the Kevin Brown era, blessedly, and as George (yes, he does love to win) fades from the scene, something in between monster payrolls and chintsy smart-ball teams is emerging. It has power, good (not great) pitching and an aggressive versatility missing in recent years. Adversity can in fact, be healthy, as the Red Sox will now learn. In beating the Yankees, Boston somehow became them. But this was one of those games that wasn't really about a game, but a season. Exciting and dramatic.

From the Vined Smithy said...

Personally, I don't feel like the Red Sox became the Yankees. It was a glorious moment, but I feel sure that in the decades to come, there will be other glorious moments. Sometimes the Yankees will win; sometimes the Red Sox will win. It's the nature of two money-monsters sharing a division.

This year, the Yankees will win (but I would guess they will not win it all).